How to Talk to your Parents About Getting In-Home Care

As our parents age, certain hard truths must be accepted by us as children: good health is a limited resource, and our parents can no longer perform all the tasks they once could. On some level, we have always been aware of these realities. Unfortunately, we are forced to deal with our aging parents.

Their lives won’t become unhappy and joyless as they become older. We are living in some of the best moments of our lives right now in many respects. However, there will come a time when we realize our parents might require some assistance with activities of daily living (ADLs), whether it’s because of normal aging, mobility problems, or a diagnosis of Alzheimer’s disease or dementia. ADLs or daily activities include things like showering, dressing, brushing their teeth or hair, preparing meals, taking medications, and cleaning the house. Your older loved one may need in-home care if you’ve observed that they’ve fallen in these areas in order to help secure their health and safety.


Starting the conversation about in-home care

Starting the conversation is definitely one of the most difficult steps in the procedure, especially if there is a lot of opposition to the idea of in-home care. This is an entirely natural response. After all, your parents have been taking independent showers and getting dressed for many years. It might be difficult for someone to accept that they need assistance with such basic tasks and are gradually losing their independence.

However, The truth is that in-home care allows people to remain independent in their homes for a longer period of time, which actually increases their level of independence. You can start the conversation effectively by following these suggestions:


1. Be direct, sincere, and organized

Start the discussion directly and confidently expressing your issues. Although the older adult may be shocked or surprised by what they’re hearing, they actually value your concerns.

Additionally, it’s crucial to conduct research on area in-home senior care providers. Before speaking with your elderly relative, you can make a shortlist and interview a few candidates. Since a stranger will be entering their house, your loved one is likely to have a lot of questions. Be prepared with a variety of information to ease their concerns. Again they will appreciate the effort and care you put into your research.


2. Show love and empathy

It is crucial to approach this conversation from a place of love and empathy rather than using phrases like “This is for your own benefit,” which can’t emphasize enough. An argument that results from a negative approach will prevent further meaningful discussion.

Do the opposite and consider yourself in their position, imagine hearing that you now require assistance with routine tasks that you have always completed without difficulty. How might you feel? A life-changing reality that can be difficult to accept for anybody is the need for assistance with daily activities (ADLs). When talking about eldercare, always remember to be loving and compassionate.


3. Present options without deciding on them

You might be tempted to take this initiative in picking which elder care organization to engage with, which services to purchase, and when to begin care.

Despite your best intentions, your elderly relative might resist if you take control of the decision-making. This is due to their desire to maintain their current level of dependence. They will be much more likely to accept this change while still feeling in charge if their options are presented to them, discussed, and allowed to make the final decisions.


4. Make it about their needs

Always keep your loved one’s needs for health and safety in mind during the discussion; never consider what might be more practical or easier for you to handle. Eldercare helps ease aging in place while relieving the family of many caregiving responsibilities, but prioritizing your parents’ needs should come first.

Talk about what’s most important to them in order to maintain a high standard of living. After that, you can look into what elder care services are offered to assist in meeting those needs. Go along with their request if they only want to accept one service at first, such as meal preparation or housekeeping. As the degree of comfort for your loved one increases, you can always add more services.


5. Give them enough time to decide

It makes sense that you’d want the procedure to move along as rapidly as possible. Although it’s likely that after the first talk they won’t want to decide. Avoid the tendency to get irritated or frustrated. Give them some time to adjust to these changes. Remember that they may also be confused, forgetful, or uncertain as a result of the natural physical and mental changes associated with aging. To maintain fruitful discussions and their sense of control, proceed with the decisions at their pace.


6. Be realistic about the costs

While discussing finance might be difficult, you must take your loved one’s budget into consideration in order to personalize their care plan. The eldercare provider should be able to assist in developing a more focused, all-encompassing plan that also fits within your budget. A plan for additional care funds should also be included in case your loved one’s future care requirements change.


Preparing yourself for change

There is no need for you to disappear just because the caregiver will be there in your parents’ lives. You are still allowed to take part in their care plan and provide your loved one with the care you feel is acceptable.

Above all, remember that your actions are motivated by love. By being unable to take care of them yourself, you did not let your parents down. Giving care is a major task that consumes a lot of your time away from your own profession, family, and social activities. Instead of taking care of your parent’s daily needs, you can hire an eldercare specialist and spend more time with them.


Contact with Lenity Management Community staff when it’s time to look into eldercare choices for a beloved friend or family member. Our team specializes in seeing to it that all of your loved one’s needs are addressed, including homemaking and meal preparation, personal care, activities and light companionship, Alzheimer’s disease and dementia care, and much more.


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